A Mother and Her Son

A woman had quit work to stay home and take care of her new baby daughter. Countless hours of peekaboo and other games slowly took their toll. One evening she smacked her bare toes on the corner of a dresser and, grabbing her foot, sank to the floor. Her husband rushed to her side and asked where it hurt. She looked at her husband through her tear-filled eyes and managed to moan, “It’s the piggy that ate the roast beef.” (1)

Another harried mother had three very active boys. One summer evening she was playing cops and robbers in the back yard after dinner. One of the boys “shot” his mother and yelled, “Bang! You’re dead.” She slumped to the ground. When she didn’t get up right away, a neighbor ran over to see if she had been hurt in the fall.

When the neighbor bent over, the overworked mother opened one eye and said, “Shhh. Don’t give me away. It’s the only chance I’ve had to rest all day.”

It’s never been easy being a mother. Do you think it was any easier for Mary, the mother of Jesus? Life was no picnic for the wife of a carpenter in Nazareth. They were not an affluent family. The scripture tells us that when Mary and Joseph dedicated Jesus at the temple, the offering they made was only two turtle doves--the offering prescribed for poor families. But there were other children in the family besides Jesus--a house-full, in fact. There were four additional boys and an unknown number of girls. And then, after Jesus’ 12^th birthday, we don’t read any more of Joseph. He probably died young as did many men back then. Have you ever thought of Mary as a single mom with a house full of children? How did she did she do it? She never remarried. How did she support them? Maybe this is why Jesus delayed beginning his ministry until he was thirty. Maybe Mary needed help raising his younger siblings.

It was not any easier after Jesus began his ministry. Mary did not understand Jesus’ teachings. She better than anyone else knew that he was sent of God, but he didn’t talk like the other religious figures in their culture--in fact, many of his teachings were in direct conflict with the conventional wisdom of their time. She and his brothers worried about him. They even asked him to come home. They knew that no good could come from challenging the established order of things.

And they did well to worry. For soon the establishment struck back. There hangs her baby boy on a cross. And at the foot of the cross stood his mother. All his disciples had forsaken him, but not his mother.

After Jesus’ resurrection, Mary began to understand that what he had been teaching, though it was not what she had been taught, was reflective of who his Father really was. And Mary, the mother of Jesus, became one of his followers. And there she is in today’s lesson, just before Pentecost, with the disciples awaiting the gift of the Holy Spirit. The writer of Acts tells it this way: “These all with one mind were continually devoting themselves to prayer, along with the women, and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brothers.”

Do you think it was easy for Mary? It’s never easy being a mother. CHILDREN CAN BAFFLE YOU. Jesus baffled Mary. At his birth she knew he was special. Who could forget the testimony of the shepherds and the wise men? When she and Joseph took Jesus to the temple at age twelve, she saw how he amazed the elders and the priests with his answers. He was truly about his Father’s business. At the wedding in Cana of Galilee, she saw him turn water into wine. He was special. She knew that. But she also saw him fail in his effort to impact the people of his own village. And his teachings disturbed her. She and her other sons went to hear him teach on one occasion, but they were turned away. She heard him say, “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” And she saw him stretch forth his hand toward his disciples, and say, “Behold my mother and my brethren! For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother.” (Matthew 12:49-50) Didn’t he know who his real family was? What was happening to him? Have you ever been baffled by your own children?

Children keep us on our toes, don’t they? Asa Sparks tells when he was a Christian Education Director in Birmingham, Alabama. He and his wife had invited his secretary, Charleigh, and her family to their home for dinner. As they were sharing around the table after the meal, the Sparks’ three-year-old, Libbie, climbed up in Charleigh’s lap. Libbie then said to Charleigh, “My Dad said you stuck your foot in your mouth. How did it taste?” (2)

Who cannot tell a story like that? As someone has said, “Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn’t have said.” That’s true. Small children can baffle you and embarrass you. So can teenagers.

Teenagers are wonderful, but during that time when they are testing out their own ideas and beliefs, they also have a tendency to test the limits. Meanwhile they’re testing your patience. Someone has humorously put it this way: Why did God have Abraham go to the sacrificial mountain to test him with sacrificing his only son, Isaac, when Isaac was only 12? The answer is, Because had Isaac been 15, Abraham may have actually gone through with it. Just kidding, of course.

Robert Fulgham, author of All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, says this about raising teenagers: The first rule is roll with the punches. The second rule is roll with the punches. And the third rule is roll with the punches. “You’re going to get punchy,” he says, “but keep doing it.”

Children can baffle you. Even adult children. Jesus did not cease being Mary’s son simply because he passed thirty. She still worried about him as he began his ministry, just like many of you worry about adult children. Children can baffle you.

AND CHILDREN CAN BREAK YOUR HEART. You might remember Rita Rudner’s great line: “My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child,” she said on one occasion. “We can’t decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives.” It broke Mary’s heart to see Jesus hanging on the cross. Can’t you imagine her weeping with great sobs as she gazed upon his broken body? Her beautiful boy who would never hurt anybody in the world, hanging there in shame and disgrace like a common criminal with the blood draining out of his body. How could she make it through this awful tragedy? She would make it through the same way millions have made it through such trials through the centuries: she would lean on the strength of the One who created her son in her womb. Where else does anyone turn at such a time?

Kathy Lynn Seidl, the daughter of Dallas and Sharon Davis, was among the

168 killed in the bombing of the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City several years ago. She was thirty-nine. In the years since the bombing, the couple has also lost their eldest daughter to lung cancer and their only son to an auto accident. “I’ve asked the Lord no less than a thousand times, ‘Why?’” says Sharon Davis. “But the Lord isn’t talking to me much right now. I’m in the dark.” (3)

There’s a mother whose heart is truly breaking. Having children can do that to you. Sometimes they break our hearts because in the veil of tears which is life, we lose a child. Some times children break our hearts because we can’t stand to see them suffering--whether that suffering be mental or physical. Other times they break our hearts by wrongdoing. There is no pain like the pain of a parent whose heart is breaking over a child.

Children can baffle you and children can break your heart. And yet generation after generation we keep having children. Why? BECAUSE CHILDREN MAKE LIFE WORTHWHILE. They fill our lives with joy. They give our lives meaning and purpose. Some unknown author has put it like this:

“The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140 for a middle income family. Talk about sticker shock. That doesn’t even touch college tuition . . . But $160,140 isn’t so bad if you break it down. It translates into $8,896.66 a year, $741.38 a month or $171.08 a week. That’s a mere $24.44 a day. Just over a dollar an hour. Still, you might think the best financial advice says don’t have children if you want to be rich. It’s just the opposite. There’s no way to put a price tag on:

“Feeling a new life move for the first time and seeing the bump of a knee rippling across your skin. Having someone cry, ‘It’s a boy!’ or shout, ‘It’s a girl!’ then hearing the baby wail and knowing all that matters is it’s healthy. Counting all 10 fingers and toes for the first time. Feeling the warmth of fat cheeks against your breast. Cupping an entire head in the palm of your hand. Making out da da or ma ma from all the cooing and gurgling.

“What do you get for your $160,140? Naming rights. First, middle and last. Glimpses of God every day. Giggles under the covers every night. More love than your heart can hold. Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs. Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds and warm cookies. A hand to hold, usually covered with jam. A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites, building sandcastles and skipping down the sidewalk in the pouring rain. Someone to laugh yourself silly with no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.

“For $160,140, You never have to grow up. You get to fingerpaint, carve pumpkins, play hide-and-seek, catch lightning bugs and never stop believing in Santa Claus. You have an excuse to keep reading the adventures of Piglet and Pooh, watching Saturday morning cartoons, going to Disney movies and wishing on stars.

“You get to frame rainbows, hearts and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray-painted noodle wreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for

Mother’s Day and cards with backward letters for Father’s Day.

“For $160,140, there’s no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof, taking the training wheels off the bike, removing a sliver, filling the wading pool, coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs and coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless. You get a front row seat to history to witness the first step, first word, first bra, first date, first time behind the wheel. You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you’re lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren. You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications and human sexuality no college can match. In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there with God. You have the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost.” (4)

Children can baffle you and break your heart. But they can bring you great joy as well. Maybe that’s why God had children. Certainly we baffle God with our actions. And occasionally we break God’s heart. Still, God loves us so much that God sent Christ to give his life in our behalf. On this Mother’s Day, it would be good if we remembered Mary the mother of Jesus. She was baffled by her son. On one occasion her heart was broken. But she loved him and stood by him to the end. Why? Because that is what life is all about. Love within the human family. Love within the divine family. Love, which comes from the heart of God.

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1. Parables, Etc. Vol. 21. No 4, June 2001, pg. 1.

3. As quoted by James Emery White, A Search for the Spiritual: Exploring Real Christianity (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker, 1998), 77-78. Cited by Leonard Sweet.

4. Author Unknown. ktodd@vci.net (Keith Todd) Reply-to: Please note: I have searched diligently for the author of this reading. It is posted many places on the web and has been sent out on several ezines, but nowhere can we find an author listed. If you can help with this, we would like to give due credit.